As I laid in bed the night before last mulling over a humdrum day now passed, I was hit with a sudden awareness of how much my life has changed since having graduated college this past May. For the first time in 23 years I don’t have to live my life according to a set schedule. The year isn’t broken up into semester blocks further separated by long-awaited spring, summer and winter breaks, no now it’s just a fluid progression of time, unplanned with no scheduled stops and goes! The all-nighters that became routine as I crumbled under an 18-unit course load are now irrelevant; and the fact that my wake-sleep patterns are no longer based on making it to class on time, well that is a beautiful thing. That’s freedom. A breath-taking sight that only took four months for the realization, along with its accompanying confusion & ‘now what?’ line of questioning to fully hit.
The realization was sparked from a random recollection of a journey I began back in December of 2011, one I ultimately abandoned in favor of finishing my actual degree. It was my own personal self-exploration project, with the book The Artist’s Way as my guide…
WOOOOOhooooooo, Oh man I’m so excited, I’d forgotten about The Artist’s Way! This is great, now that I don’t have school I can actually devote my attention to this inspirational guide and embark on that journey I put on hold!
Completely amped, I wanted to start my artists pages the very next day. The only problem was I no longer had the book. It had been lent to me initially by my former roommate Dave, a world-traveling hippiesque surfer who loves books, film and researching all things related to personal development and spirituality. He saw me struggling under a colossal weight of self-inflicted pressure to discover both my style as a writer, and as a professional journalist, with the ultimate goal of merging the two beauty-queens into one coherent whole.
The following day during an unplanned stroll down Santa Monica Blvd. I stumbled upon ‘Thunder Bolt Books,’ a new and used spiritual books store on the westside. I was immediately drawn to a massive book that lay open on display outside the shop. Equivalent to the length of a small coffee table it boasted an equally lengthy title: An Encyclopedic Outline of Masonic, Hermetic, Qabbalistic and Rosicrucian Symbolical Philosophy. It was so beautifully intimidating that I got goose bumps. I reluctantly looked away, accepting the fact that I couldn’t very well stand out there for the next several hours absorbing all that filled its pages. I glanced over several titles which filled a few small book shelves outside the shop until I paused and met Ram Dass’ name with delightful recognition. I felt a smile of gratitude toward the universe for leading me here.
And right as I thought I couldn’t be anymore satisfied with my discoveries, low and behold the book I wanted with such urgency the night before called my attention as it sat there on the $5.00 sale rack. I laughed with surprise and amusement at the irony of being led to what I had wanted after having settled on purchasing it through Amazon in order to save $20…. Now I got my book and still saved money, plus the universe helped solve a reoccurring personal dilemma I encounter when faced with the decision of nobly supporting actual human beings in a real live book store or saving a buck while assisting in the destruction of the mom and pop shops at the hand of the Gentile Wizards of Amazon, who are no doubt, rolling in the dough as we speak.